Old Timers: Sleep - "Dopesmoker"

Alright, I’m sure some of you out there are asking why Dopesmoker is coming up as an Old Timer, since it was released in 2003. First of all, I would like to point out that when we first started Old Timers, we explained that we weren’t positive how old something would need to be in order to qualify. So, this album was released six years ago, and since I’m an editor for the site, I say that’s fine.

But wait! Like an amazing infomercial, there’s always more. Turns out, this album has a past some may not know about. It was released in a slightly different form under the name Jerusalem as a bootleg and then officially in 1998 and 1999 respectfully. The label carrying Sleep was causing issues, and the band didn’t want to edit any portions. However, since the song was already tracked and whatnot, it ended up getting released as said bootleg split up into sections instead of the 105 minute single song as the band intended, and then was later picked up by a label. So technically, this bitchin’ tune goes back to the 90’s. The version I am yapping about in this post is the 2003 release put out the way the band had always wanted.

So now that I got all that information out of the way, you can set your dicks to hard and get ready for the actual reasons this record is getting a post. The main reason, of course, is that it’s fucking awesome. If you want to get into stoner metal or doom metal, this is a great place to start, and if you’re already into said genres and haven’t heard this, ask your mom to bring you to the mall to pick this shit up. The version going as Dopesmoker contains the epic title track and another called “Sonic Titan,” which is recorded live. “Sonic Titan” is much shorter and a bit faster paced, but it’s not the real reason to grab this record. It’s all about “Dopesmoker.”

Listening to over an hour and a half of metal is always gnarly as balls, especially if it’s uninterrupted. Although slow, “Dopesmoker” remains super heavy, and Sleep makes sure you’ll be nodding your head like a hippie at Woodstock. Plus, while the main structure is fairly repetitive, things are broken up nicely with guitar acrobatics and musical lulls in order to keep the listener interested. Don’t get me wrong, you’ll probably zone out from time to time, but that’s the point isn’t it? Every time you return to this behemoth you’ll remember why you’ve been listening to it for so damn long, and you’ll certainly be ready to continue on.

I definitely think this is an album to revisit or check out if you’ve never given a listen. Put it on in the car with your grandma; she’ll love it.

Old Timers: Dillinger Four - "Midwestern Songs of the Americas"

I heart Dillinger Four. They are one of those bands you can always turn to when you simply want to break it down, especially while drunk. In 1998 they released what I personally believe is their best album. This album, of course, was “Midwestern Songs of the Americas,” and I’m going to tell you why I like it so much, gosh dangit.

This record had everything you could ever want. It was full of energy, yet remained catchy enough to have you pumping your fist to every track. Plus, D4 songs were made for sing-alongs. Or yell-alongs, depending on you look at it. While most of the other D4 albums are pretty good, there was something about this one that just sucked you in. Somehow, most of the songs seemed familiar, even if you had just heard it for the first time. Although, I guess a lot of punk rock could fall into that category, seeing as it is pretty formulaic. But I’m sticking with my statement. Plus, listening to this album would put you in a good mood faster than sucking down a bottle of cough syrup. Think of one bad time you had while listening to this album. You can’t. Unless you count throwing up on that cute girl you were interested in the first time you threw back a few brews in your friend’s garage while his parents were out of town trying to rekindle the love they never had in the first place. But you were having fun before the vomit assault, so I don’t know how much I want to count on that example.

What else do you want me to say? This was straight up guitar-driven punk rock. It was the stuff made for skate videos or for driving around with no point whatsoever. We all listened to Dillinger Four when we were younger. Every punk rocker was into them at some point. Knowing their songs was a prerequisite for punkness. So just play this thing and take a trip back to the time when your parents put a roof over your head, fed you, and your biggest responsibility was figuring out who was going to buy you beer each weekend. Ah, yes, the good old days.

Here's D4 playing "Super Powers Enable Me to Blend in with Machinery." It's a shitty video, but you would be surprised at how hard it is to find a decent video of these dudes.

Old Timers: Immortal - "Pure Holocaust"

Black metal is fucking awesome. Sure, it might need to be absorbed with a good sense of humor, seeing as it is so over-the-top, but then again, a lot of shit is over-the-top and still amazing. We all know the whole deal with what constitutes black metal: worshiping Satan, church burnings, face paint, goofy black outfits with spikes all over them, skulls on stakes and goat/pig sacrifices at shows, etc, but did you know one of the bands to help get all that started was Immortal? I bet you didn't. To be completely honest, I bet a lot of you don't even know who the fuck Immortal is. This is your wake-up call.

Before bands like Dimmu Borgir brought black metal to a more general audience, there were a ton of other bands lurking around Scandinavian countries laying the groundwork for this music. Bands like the Darkthrone, Emperor, and the murder-loving Mayhem were among the first to create the sound we would consider black metal today. And I know a bunch of you are going to be like, "Hey man, actually bands like Celtic Frost were first-wave, blah blah blah," but I'm talking about the solidified sound, not glorified thrash metal. Got it? Good. Let's move on.

Well, Immortal was one of those bands involved in the second-wave sound; the one we think of today. And they were killer. With Pure Holocaust, they also managed to create a genre-defining album. And let's get something straight: Although many black metal bands did infuse themes of National Socialism into records for shock value, much like the Sex Pistols, this album mostly contains themes about landscapes in Norway and the demise of the human race; it's not a Skrewdriver album. So don't get on my case about Neo-Nazi propaganda.

So what makes this album so great? Well, let me tell you! It's got everything one could possibly love about black metal. It has the progressions and speed, along with the ghoulish vocals. The imagery is dark and bleak, and we all love dark and bleak. Plus, just look at the cover! It has to be good! I remember trying to dress like Immortal in grade school, but my mom wasn't having it. Part of that last statement was a lie, but which part? That I tried to dress like Immortal, or that my mom wouldn't let me? You may never know.

But seriously, listen to this album. If you have never heard real black metal, this is a good place to start. It gives you everything you want. It's sexy in a demonic kind of way. It's also just plain terrific.

Old Timers: Swing Kids - "Discography"

What can really be said about Swing Kids? They were insanely influential to a shitload of bands that rock/rocked like no other. Like Orchid? Like Plot to Blow Up the Eiffel Tower? Where do you think they got their sound from? Orchid just sped it up and shortened it, and PBUET just added jazz and little bit of Drive Like Jehu. And even back then, Swing Kids had a song with jazz in it. "Disease," anyone? By the way, right when the guitar kicks in, there is a little part that was blatantly ripped off by another band, but I can't remember who it was for the life of me. I was thinking Avenging Disco Godfathers of Soul, but I can't find it, so I might be wrong. If you know, let me know. I'm positive it's an emo-violence/screamo band. At any rate, the point is that Swing Kids showed a bunch of people the way.

So what could be better than a discography? I mean, let's be honest, the band existed for merely a second and barely put anything out so this collection is about the same length as an LP, but it's still worth getting. Why? you ask. Because even if you don't care about the history of emo, emo-violence, screamo, or emotional hardcore, this band was fucking rad. They laid the path for the spoken/screamed vocals picked up by so many bands. They also set up a song structure that was copied by so many bands after them. Pretty much any band ever to release something on Level-Plane, Witching Hour, Ebullition, or the old Magic Bullet listened to these guys. Swing Kids pervades all their sounds. So if you like that shit, which you should, then why wouldn't you like these fellas?

Don't be a doofus. Pick up some Swing Kids. You'll also sound cool in first-wave emo circles.

(Disclaimer before I get a ton of emails/comments: First-wave emo is not the shit on MTV today. It was what screamo and emo-violence were based off of. Some call it emotional hardcore to make sure douche bags don't accuse them of listening to Dashboard. Look it up if you don't believe me. Or just check out the video of them playing "Warsaw" live below, and tell me if it sounds like fucking Jimmy Eat World.)

Old Timers: Avail - "Dixie"

Remember 1994? Remember Avail? Remember when they dropped "Dixie"?! While I don't really remember 1994 as a whole, I certainly do remember this album. Avail is one of those bands that all your punk friends listened to and loved at some point in their lives. There's good reason for this. Mainly, because Avail was fucking awesome. The band was probably the only good thing to ever come out of Richmond, Virginia besides the Powhatan Indians. And you know that the Powhatan didn't rock nearly as hard as Avail did.

One of my first punk shows was Avail, and I can still remember how the crowd went ballistic whenever anything was played off Dixie. I'd put money on the assumption that this was pretty much everyone's favorite Avail record. It was the perfect mix of melody, politics, and good old hardcore. I like to call this mix of elements "The Trifecta," even though it has nothing to do with horse betting. (If you don't get that joke, stop using the word.) But seriously, songs like "Clone" and "On the Nod" were instant classics. To this day, when I hear them, I get giddy like a schoolgirl after her first makeout/fingerbang combo. And that's pretty fucking giddy.

So even though I've been giving Tim Barry's solo stuff a lot of airplay, I still love to go back and listen to him yell out the vocals for Avail. I also like the rest of the band; don't get offended guys.

Go back and listen to this. Or die. (Alright, you probably won't die.)

Here's Avail live doing "Clone." The audio sucks, but it captures the energy. I did my best.

Old Timers: Metallica - "Kill 'Em All"

Remember when Metallica used to be good? It was a long time ago, but I'm sure one or two of you out there have a vague memory of the amazing thrash brought by these guys back in the day. Sure, they are more recently known as the whiny bitches that took on Napster or the guys that put out that giant hunk of shit known as St. Anger, but that doesn't mean they shouldn't be recognized for their past accomplishments. Since this is the case, I'm going to take it upon myself to give them some credit by talking about how killer their first album was.

Honestly, these guys managed to bring a whole new generation of people to metal, and they also did a great job on improving a lot of what was around at the time. Metallica wanted to play their choons louder and faster than anybody else, and they proved it on this bad boy. When Kill 'Em All first came out, it didn't really get a ton of recognition, but that just seems to happen sometimes. Nowadays people know how head-banging this fucker is, and that's all that matters. This one's got some of the most ripping guitar work you'll ever hear, and since we at the Belly think ripping guitar work is totally fuckshark awesome, it ranks pretty high with us. Plus, Hetfield's voice is one the most recognizable in all of metal (besides Rob Halford from Judas Priest, of course), and this album is where we first got to hear it. Who can't love those weird little accentuations he puts on the ends of certain words?

This record is a circle pit waiting to happen, and that is just gnar. Songs like "The Four Horsemen" and "Whiplash" are classics that deserve to be listened to again. Don't let them just sit there not being played. They'll thank you for it.

Here they are live playing "The Four Horsemen."

Old Timers: The Dead Milkmen - "Big Lizard in My Backyard"

It’s 1985, the year the United Nations decided to call International Youth Year. The San Francisco 49ers defeat the Dolphins for the NFL Championship. It is the 40th anniversary of the atomic bomb being dropped on Japan, and DNA is used in the first criminal case. But none of these events are anywhere near the importance of one thing: The Dead Milkmen release Big Lizard in My Backyard this year.

It’s always nice when a band puts out some rockin’ jams, but it’s even better when they put out rockin’ jams that are also funny. Fortunately, this album contains these types of songs. They are catchy and witty, as most of you should already know. Not bad for their first LP, right? Right.

While the sound stays fairly true to simple punk/college rock, there are certainly other influences. There’s a little bit of country, some rockabilly, a touch of reggae. Of course, using these styles helps with comedic effect, but they are also just cool. That’s right, cool. I’ll say it if I want to, and I just did. Eat it. I dare you. The thing that’s so great about this little gem is that they do manage to keep the music fun. Sure, it’s not always PC, with songs like “Takin’ Retards to the Zoo,” but do we really always need to be so nice? The answer is obviously a no. Nice is for social workers (sometimes). I’m not a social worker, and I think it’s funny to see old ladies fall down on ice in winter. Does that mean I’m going to Hell? Well, no, because Hell doesn’t exist, but I don’t think I would go to a hypothetical hell either. I will also not be going to any sort of hypothetical hell for liking The Dead Milkmen. That’s just the way it is.

At any rate, this album is great. It’s simple and fun. It’s humorous. It’s danceable. It’s all you need in a good record. Unleash her again.

The Dead Milkmen - "Punk Rock Girl" (even though it's not on the album... but everything else on youtube was just shitty)

Old Timers: Beastie Boys - "Ill Communication"

Ahhhhhhh shit! Ya herrrrrrd me! What can honestly be said about the Beastie Boys? Everybody already knows they kick ass. Everybody already knows they’ve managed to hook in people that would normally try to stray away from hip-hop, for whatever reasons they may come up with. Everybody already knows that these motherfuckers are goofy as hell. I’m mean, what else could you want from them?

Ill Communication is a hella album, plain and simple. Not only does it provide us with the breaks and rhymes we all know and love, but it also hooks us up with some of the Beastie Boys tracks as a New York hardcore band. True, they were awful as said hardcore band, but it’s still fun to hear them give it a shot sometimes. Overall though, the hip-hop tracks are the obvious standouts. They provide a fresh feel while including a heavy does of the old school sound, and that is just what the doctor ordered (I assume). Who can stand still to “Root Down”? The answer: no one. Even that tough-acting-straight-edge-hardcore-‘I only listen to Blood for Blood’-guy out there can’t help but dance. Sure, he’ll play it off as if he’s making fun of the song, but the fact is, he just wants to get down. Don’t be embarrassed, homeboy. All your tough-acting-straight-edge-hardcore-‘I wear my Boston baseball cap backwards cuz it proves I wanna fight’-guy friends are thinking the same thing. Once you get moving, they’ll all join in on “making fun” of the song, too. I’ve seen a million times before. Then they light a blunt and all get turned on to heroin and prostitutes.

But seriously, this album is one of those that can be turned on at your friend’s place and everyone seems to know every word. Hell, it’s got fucking “Sabotage” on it. You can’t even pretend to not like that song. Even priests pour holy water on themselves, drink the sacred wine, eat all those cracker-things they like so much, and dance naked to that song. It’s that good. I bet the only guy that doesn’t like it is Mike Huckabee, but fuck that doucher anyway; he doesn’t count. He’s like a god-bot or some shit. Uncool, brotha.

Alright, enough of my babbling. Pull this album out and put it on. Play it loud. Invite people over. Have a goddamn good time for once. You know you haven’t since your bastard child was born.

A refresher aka "Sabotage"

Old Timers: Fear - "Live... for the Record"

Hunt it down. Find it. Buy it. Listen to it. Worship it. Laugh with it. Sleep with it. Cry with it... Make babies.

If you're new to the church of Fear, most assjacks tell you to just go in chronological order of their releases and appreciate their contributions to the late late 70's and early 80's LA punk/core scene, with their quasi-offensive and silly-with-a-fist combative nature. However, I have to call shenanigans on that jazz, cuz I whole-spleenly feel that you should just fuck out the middle man and skip right to the gnarspot (affectionately known as the G-spot). Everyone knows that when a live record is done right, the songs are a little more energetic, a little faster, a little rougher, and a little louder. And if you're a lucky shit, you get some variations on the originally recorded material, some between-song banter, and an altogether more lively, acidic experience... Duh, gurl... And obviously, when done wrong, you get 90% of the live albums you can go pick up at your local Circuit Shitty.

This one, my sea-legged brethren, thankfully falls in the former... that delicious 10% of live albums that gets the job done, and done, and then some, dumdum. The reason I push you to pick this one up first, speaking as if knowing you are some newcomer to this forgotten gem (cuz who we kidding, we both know you are, sillypants), is because this powerhouse o' powerviolence is packed to the gums with 19 tunes that each wanna make me do 19 separate spastic jigs like I have 19 separate spastic colons when they come on. And you got some spanning shit on here! It's like a modern day best of the litter! And not only this, like stated above, shit's more energetic, faster, rougher, and louder... And Lee Ving's crooning snarl is so much more endearing when it's not polished and packaged.

But probably the most bang for the buck comes from the between-jam chatterboxing, from the band and from the crowd. This recording, which went out live on the radio back en la dia, has horribly-delivered jokes, as well as horrible jokes delivered quite well... but some of the best shits comes from randoms in the crowd who have some of the sharpest wit I've ever heard, and that's saying a lot when talking about a gaggle of some dumb punks crammed into some dumb hole in the wall for a Fear show... Check out the vid below for an example of a good ol' Fear live set...

Fear - "I Love Livin' in the City" (live) [taken from The Decline of Western Civilization]

Old Timers: Crass - "The Feeding of the 5000"

Hello again, fiends of the Belly. I know the Spleen just did an Old Timers, but I had been meaning to get this one up for awhile and never got to it. But don't worry, because I am bringing it to you now.

For many, this album will come as no surprise, and really, I think it would have made a good first entry to this section. I don't know why it wasn't. I guess I just wasn't using the old noggin earlier. And for those of you that are confused as to why I am making such a big stink about this little gem, let me explain. The Feeding of the 5000 is the first album released by one of punk's most important bands: Crass. These guys (and girls) were one of the greatest examples of a DIY band ever. They were also at the forefront of the anarcho-punk movement, although some have said, and I tend to agree after careful attention to their lyrics and lifestyles, that the band represented a view more closely related to libertarian communism. Either way, they were extremely political both in music and action.

So why The Feeding of the 5000 and not Christ: The Album, for example? Well, as I said, this was their first album, and that is pretty important with a band like this, since the sound was pretty new. Not only that, but it has one of the best anti-religion songs ever as its opener. In fact, the original release (1978) was not able to actually carry the aforementioned song, entitled "Reality Asylum," because the plant pressing the records refused to make them since the lyrics were considered to be blasphemy. Crass pulled the song and initially left the first 2 minutes of the record blank, with the song title being "The Sound of Free Speech." It was not until Crass set up their own label and re-released the album in 1981 that the song made it to pressing. The track is called "Asylum" on this pressing.

But beyond this, all the music carries a message that still holds true today in our world of ideological politics and the world's laziness in any sort of reaction to the problems presented by the egotistical nutjob politicians and the corporate, asinine bullshit fed to mainstream consumers everyday, although I guess it's peoples' own fault for being the said mainstream sheep and eating up the slop they are presented with. Crass were all about anti-religion, feminism, gay rights, environmentalism, anti-consumerism, and peace, and you can get a good dose of all those themes on this record. But also, the music is just, plain good.

So if you have never listened to this album, do it now. Otherwise, re-listen to it. It's killer, man.

Old Timers: The Dicks - "1980-1986"

Sorry for the delay of new content for the weekend, bruisers... I was busy battling a cold that left me expelling 18 lbs of green garbage from my face, backing myself off just shy of the lethal dose of Actifed and Ibuprofen, and hand-trucking my 80 lb head around the house on a dolly... but regardless, that's no excuse... so here we are.

I felt the urge to blow the dust off this column since we've only had one entry for it, and cuz I was listening to this album so much over the weekend while shackled to my mattress, bedridden... So anyway, I present: The Dicks... The one band that single-handedly brought the American hardcore sound to the wild-western, oft-conservative state of Texas in 1980. Frequently playing with the Big Boys and Millions of Dead Cops, these three titans held down the Texan side of things while LA, New york, Chicago, San Fran, Boston and the rest of the tribal areas were having their own early-80's hardcore booms. Lineup changes were no stranger to the Dicks, like many other hardcore bands of the era, but the ringmaster always stayed constant. And that man was Gary Floyd, who was one of only a small crop of openly gay musicians in the scene. This little tidbit only added fuel to their politically and socially radical ideals and content... always embracing the controversy within their craft.

But as for this record in particular... It is a complete crowning gem of punk mythos often forgotten. And not only that shit, plain and simple, it's brutal, it's aggressive, it's got heart, it's got soul, it's honest, it's combatative, it's just plain fuckin righteous. This album is a sampling of their entire dicography (sidenote: also a perfect introduction to the band if your music taste is so silly that you haven't stumbled across these guys yet), sure its missing some of the stuff off the "Kill from the Heart" era, but it's an aural dynamo regardless. The thing I love about this damn band is that they meld their anger and hardcore ferocity with a certain blues and swagger comparable to none. It makes for one delicious, vicious, menacing, but sexy time... an urgency of violence spiced with a messy groove bomb. And also another sidenote, when surfing around the 'interweb' peeping a glance at what other people thought of this record, I have to harshly disagree with one thing. As with a lot of bands, if you listen to everything they've made, from first song to last, you should notice a growth -- a maturity of sorts. And the Dicks are no different from this equation. A lot of fan reviews say they can't get down on the later, more bluesy/rootsy vibe of their tunes... the ones that became more three parts blues to one part hardcore, as opposed to the inverse of their earlier jazz... and all I have to them is "fuck off and neckpunch yourself with a shoehorn, you assholes don't know shit about dick" (pun intended). Give it a chance, you're witnessing the evolution of greatness... and a righteous ride.

Just as relevant today..... The Dicks - "Fake Bands" (live @ 710 Club in Austin)

Old Timers: Judas Priest - "Screaming for Vengeance"

So I was taking a look at some shit on the internet, and since that is generally pretty boring, I decided to put on some jams. As usual, I had no idea what I wanted to listen to at the time I opened my Winamp, so I just browsed through the insane amount of music I have on my compu...

Alright, I'll just be honest. I just read Sean's update on the site, and was sitting on the crapper thinking about what I would review. A few albums came to mind, and so did a couple DVDs. But then I got a Judas Priest song stuck in my head. Perhaps my toilet symphony reminded me of "Electric Eye"? I don't know, but that's when it hit me: I'll make a section paying homage to old albums that just plain thrashed some shit up.

So here it is. "Old Timers." I have no idea what will classify an album as an old timer, but I guess that will be left up to Sean (or Seene, as I like to say) and I to decide at this point. Some will be from before we were born, some not. The main qualifier is that they had to be, and still are, mega-gnar.

So on with "Screaming for Vengeance." Some may wonder why I picked this album instead of "British Steel" or something. I don't know why. I guess just because I had "Electric Eye" stuck in my head. Even though this album is a little less ripping than some of the older Priest, it's still pretty shredtastic. Plus it's got a cool cover. And it was dropped in '82. (Actually, that makes no difference, but whatever.) As usual, the music is full of killer riffage, and Halford's voice is amazingly unique. All the songs are pretty sexy, except for "Fever," which just pretty much blows. "You Got Another Thing Comin'" and "Electric Eye" are just plain righteous, not to mention the solo in "Devil's Child," which rocks like an Alabama hooker.

You've probably already heard it. You probably already own it. But I think it's about time to dig out Judas Priest's "Screaming for Vengeance" and put on a t-shirt with the sleeves ripped off. Gnar.